13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do
By Amy Morin
- Mentally strong people Replace self pity with gratitude. Marla Runyan run marathon in a bit more 2 hours, wrote a book, has a master degree, and all this being blind since the age of 9. Increase gratitude gets your health better.
- Hold onto their power and forgive others. Madonna receipt rejection from multiple record companies, they refuse to delegate the power over their lives to others. Oprah is another example, poor, abused, rejected, she hold to her power, how she did, forgiving other is important to free you up and you gain focus back on you. Forgiveness reduces stress.
- Are always ready to embrace change. Judge Greg Mathis, arrested several times as teenager, he promise his dying mother to change, then worked in mcdonals, and then studied laws, but due to his criminal records couldn’t work, so he worked in non profit organisation, and then he was elected judge. Beware of thoughts like: “it is not worth the effort, I failed in the past…”. Learn how to ignore this type of thoughts and create a plan for successful change: a) set yourself a 30-day goal. b) Decide on concrete, daily changes in your behaviour that will help you reach that goal. c) Create a list of anticipated hurdles along the way. d) Create accountability (ask someone to test you). e) Measure progress. Be mindful about your change.
4. Don’t get distracted by things they cant control. Terry Fox, diagnosed with bone cancer, when he was 18, his leg amputated, 15% change of surviving. The day of the surgery, he read about a person with prosthetic leg ran NY marathon, that inspired him and he decided to run, he run his first marathon, and then decided to run the whole CAnada coast to coast, raising money for cancer research, at the middle of the task, his cancer came back and he broke his leg, needed to be hospitalised, money from donations continue coming, he died some time after, but he saw his donations amount for 23M dollars. Lesson: don’t waste effort on what you cant control; concentrate on doing what you can. Happiest people stir their lives in the direction they want.
5. Always wanting to please other doesn’t work, and being ready to sometimes displease makes you stronger. Take the example of Mose Gingerich, raised Aimish, begun visiting other aimish towns just to learn how life was outside, at the end he left his community and built a construction business and married, that displised his community but fulfilled his life.
6. MSP are not afraid of taking calculated risks. Estimate the nature of the risk. Create strategies to confront your fears, baby steps get you to move. Start looking at the risks that hold you back. Maybe they aren’t as dangerous and scary as you’ve always imagined.
7. Coming to terms with the past makes you stronger, but it takes concrete steps to do so. Coming to terms with the past doesnt mean acting as if certain things never happened; you must accept and forgive the past so that you can build on it in the present. First you have give yourself permission to enjoy your life, despite what might have happened in the past. Your heartbreak of the past is no reason not to keep looking for true love.
8. MSP avoid repeating the same mistake, and this requires self-discipline. Study and learn from your mistakes. Ask yourself: What did I do wrong? What could I have done better? And what can I do differently next time around? Try to set negative feelings and self-doubt aside and simply answer the questions honestly. Keep your eyes on your goal. Make a list of the reasons you dont want to repeat the mistakes youve made int he past. Restrict yourself and make it harder to make mistakes (get temptation out of the way).
9. MSP dont envy other people’s success but rather seek to collaborate with them.
10. MSP dont give up easily, and they are self-compassionate about failure. What was failure according to Edison? REsearch, learning, growing.It is important that you learn to be self-compassionate about your failures and mistakes.
11. MSP are confortable being alone and use meditation to become more resilient. Dont run from yourself, turning TV on, going to smartphone, instead become attentive to yourself, and use this to rejuvenation, inspiration, reflection. Listen to your own feelings and notice if there is stress or negative emotions that need addressing. Write it so you dont forget (journal). Use meditation.
12. MSP concentrate on giving rather than taking. Instead of expecting the world to shower success and good fortune, concentrate on giving. This provides a reason for living.
13. MSP recognize that achievement take time and that progress isnt always inmediately apparent. Dont think that change is easy. Dont create a fixed deadline to reach your goal. Dont think achieving your goal will make your life suddenly wonderful.
Summary: To increase your mental strenght and get more out of life, you should:
- Refrain from feeling sorry for yourself.
- Never give your power away to others.
- Embrace change.
- Avoid fretting about things you cant control
- Stop worrying about pleasing everyone
- Never be afraid of taking risks, but be clever about which risks you take
- REsist the urge to dwell on the past
- Make sure to never make the same mistake twice
- Never be resentful of other people’s success.
- Keep at it and never give up after an initial failure
- Face your fears of being alone and overcome them
- Be on your guard for feelings of entitlement (like you deserve only the best)
- Never expect immediate results and be patient
- Become your own mental strength coach
- Monitor how you’re behaving
- Pay close attention to your feelings
- Examine your thoughts